catcalling or how not to compliment a woman

I excuse in advance for language.

This is neither book nor baking related, but I want to say it anyways. Last weekend I’ve been searching for food with my friend. We were just walking through the city, when we came past a group of young men. And the one facing us was already saying something to his friends and pointing and us and of course the whistling started and it followed us until we rounded a corner.
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Catcalling is a comment (shouting, mostly whistling) made towards people with the prospect of a sexual act following. Well, mostly it is unsuccessful, which most men know, they’re doing it just for fun. It is not a compliment, it is not done with respect and it’s mostly men calling after women. It basically means “I want to fuck you”. It does not mean in any sense “you are beautiful”. Catcalling is downgrading and reducing women to a sex object, something you can use but don’t have to treat respectfully.

And seriously, why do men still do this? I mean, there are jokes about men thinking with their dicks. And in that moment, I guess they are. Get your penis under control, damn it. But when interacting with other people, please use your brain. Maybe it would tell you to treat women with respect. If you see someone attractive, keep your dirty thoughts to yourself, don’t let that woman know that you currently objectify her. It’s bad enough to do that but there’s no need to make her feel uncomfortable in her own skin.
Remember that one time I had a really good day and wore a nice skirt and lipstick and this man drove by me and whistled and this happened again at the same day, just the week after? And teh week after? And I started wearing baggy clothes and almost no make-up because I felt so bad in my own skin? Yeah, I’m pretty sure I’m not the only woman whom something like that every happened to. Seriously, just shut your damn mouth. It’s not that hard.
I know, there are some women who actually enjoy it. I will not deny this, but the majority does not. And just think: How would you feel if someone whistled after you? How would you feel if someone just thought “wow, he has a nice ass, I want to fuck him” and downright told you this? Not so good, eh? So please, don’t do it. Just don’t.

Don’t ruin someone else’s day. How about brighten it up with a respectful, heartfelt compliment?

That just had to come out. Fucking shit.

2 thoughts on “catcalling or how not to compliment a woman”

  1. YAS Kat! I’ve tried so many times to have this discussion with guys I know, who constantly ask why girls can’t just take it as a compliment. From a young age I’ve learned not to trust men I don’t know, I’ve been followed home (whilst still a schoolgirl) three times, once by a man in van who I ended up filing a police report against. These are the type of men who started our encounter by cat calling me. Add it in that cat calling is 98% purely sexual remarks (I’ve had ‘how much would a go cost’, and ‘ lift up your skirt’ thrown at me) AND of course it makes us feel dirty and sick.

    This so shouldn’t be something that women have to explain to men in 2017.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. what?! That is awful and disgusting!
      And I looked it up, all the definitions say that catcalling has a sexual background. Even if the person doing it doesn’t know, the meaning of catcalling is per definition sexual. No matter if it’s comments or whistling or whatever. And it’s absolutely horrible. I encountered mostly whistling and cars or trucks honking at me which is just… I’m out with my dog in summer and what do I get? Some truck drivers thinking I’m fuckable.
      To be honest, I just want to slap some men in the face. And the balls, maybe that makes them think about what they are doing. I fucking hate them sometimes.

      Liked by 1 person

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